caffeine diary

I tried to do this on Wednesday night but my thoughts were a bit confuddled, so here goes... not really trying to be exceptionally coherent or anything, so just go with it.
( shiny people )

Hey all you SAT-takers out there: I hope you did fabulously this morning. Take a nap, relax, play, dance in the sun--it's over! (at least for this year)

My left wrist has been dyed black. Yes, I am aware that conventionally one dyes one's hair. I'm testing to see if my entire scalp will become bright red and itchy if I dye my hair. So my wrist is now an interesting shade of black. I'm proud of me. I'm probably going to run the allergy test for a lot less long than recommended (12 hours rather than 48). Does anyone know if this is a truly stupid idea?

My mission to become extroverted, bodily, physical, and sensual is moving slowly. Luckily, I got a second email from the female ministerperson (whom I'm considering re-nicknaming so I can refer to her by name in these long LJ rants) and have been informed that it is not necessary that I change my entire life, but rather that I take samples from the other side of the menu. Hence the plan to dye my hair black, and the listening to music loudly until my roommate yells at me to use headphones. I think I'm going to wash my roommate's dishes, for no reason except that it will make my roommate fond of me. Then I'll bounce on the bed and print out the list of friendly ministerpeople suggestions to remind me of things that I can do rather than play on the internet. *eyebrow*

I'm also going to print out a list of questions for consideration, since there are a lot of them running through my head and I'm finding it difficult to focus. Everything I want to do makes me feel guilty. Reading, writing, starting a story, writing erotica (that one especially. Why am I too young for sex? I've wanted all my life for someone to tell me that, for someone to give me a sexual ethic, but now that someone has, I'm upset about it), sending emails to people, even writing in LJ. I need to remember that she's not a goddess. She's just a ministerperson. A wise, loving, brilliant, mature ministerperson, but nothing more.

Perhaps I should do homework. This is a Thing I Need To Do.

Incidentally, my plan to start writing letters again has fallen through on the basis of criticism. I'm supposed to stop obsessing about things, and letters are apparently an obsession. Well, yes, that's pretty much a given. Obsession is, evidently, a bad thing. *eyebrow*

So, lots of things to think about.