gratuitous porn post, part the second.
Oct. 26th, 2004 03:48 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wisdomeaglefor ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
nostalgia_lj
Oh. My. God. I wrote Jack/Sam. o_O
[Jack/Sam/Pete. NC-17. Spoilers for "Affinity." Multiple partners, needless to say]
A Bad Idea
It happened, oddly enough, three weeks before Pete proposed to her. Though perhaps not so odd. People like Pete (who liked their sex missionary and their commitments formalized and their minivans inspected every thousand miles and who thought quirky was eating the cherry off an ice cream sundae first instead of last) would get the sexcapades out of the way before settling down. Still, she thought he might have waited till she'd promised to marry him before asking for a threesome.
But that was all in retrospect. At the time, she was more surprised by the request than by its timing. Not that Pete didn't strike her as the threesome type, just...
All right, Pete didn't strike her as the threesome type.
The second surprise came when she asked the General about it. She wasn't sure where she'd gotten the nerve to do that. Well, perhaps the tequila had helped, but she'd had lots of alcohol around General O'Neill (back when he was Colonel O'Neill) and it had never given her this much courage before.
Maybe it was the combination of the tequila and the hashish. She'd have to remember to thank Daniel for the hashish. If she ever recovered from the humiliation of asking General O'Neill to have sex with her.
As best she could remember, it had gone something like this:
She'd said, "Sir, would you have sex with me and Pete this Friday?"
And he'd said, "No, Carter," sort of woozily.
And she'd said, "You wouldn't have to touch his dick, sir."
And he'd said, "It's not Pete that's the problem."
And she'd said, "You don't want to have sex with me sir?" and taken another shot of tequila.
And he'd said, "I lo -- respect you too much, Carter," and taken another swig of beer.
And she'd said, "But you hate Pete."
And he'd said, "So? I hate Maybourne too. Besides which, I don't hate Pete. Very nice man."
And then Sam hadn't said anything else, because she'd passed out on Jack's couch.
Next, she had Pete ask Jack himself. "If you want to have sex with the man, just ask him," she'd said, and Pete had smiled and said, "That's what I love about you, Sam. You're so smart."
She had no idea what Pete had said, but whatever it was, it had changed the General's mind so fast she could practically hear it happening.
She had a feeling she really didn't want to know.
Pete was confident that as soon as they all got in the same room, they'd naturally leap on each other. Sam was less convinced, and had filled her fridge with a liberal supply of beer for the men. She wasn't surprised that the General brought another six-pack, the first of which he cracked open before he even sat down.
No one mentioned that it was awfully awkward. Pete was smiling so broadly that Sam didn't want to disappoint him, and the General was heroically downing as much beer as he could. Sam felt her stomach twist in anticipation as she leaned across Pete's lap to kiss her CO. He tasted, unsurprisingly, of beer, and smelled, surprisingly, of roses.
She could feel Pete's erection against her breasts, and she realized she might have leaned a bit too far over. She'd become lopsided. She felt two pairs of arms lifting her up, and decided that was a good enough start. She closed her eyes.
Two pairs of hands struggled to unzip her jeans; one pair lifted her shirt over her head while another unhooked her bra. With her eyes closed, she didn't know which hands were Pete's and which were -- Jack's -- and she liked it better that way. She concentrated on the two pairs of lips clamping shut around two nipples -- hers. She noticed, appallingly, that one tongue was moving clockwise and the other counterclockwise. Someone had better start fucking her soon, or she'd be calculating the angle of Pete's dick against his tummy.
Her eyes snapped open. "Undress," she said, in her best commanding officer voice.
"Yes, ma'am," said Jack with a wink, and Pete's eyes went glassy with desire. She watched them strip and smiled what she hoped was an evil smile. She suspected it might have been a leer. She struggled nobly not to compare dick size, but she was human after all, and they were practically begging her to --
Oh. That wasn't begging anymore. Pete had just sunk gracelessly to his knees and, without much ado, jammed Jack's dick into his mouth. Foreplay, much? But these were, after all, guys. Two guys. And they were putting this little display on just for her. They were her two guys.
She knew that she was wet. Dammit, she could feel herself getting wetter with every desperate lick Pete took. She slid a hand down to her clit, planning just to take the edge off, but she was more excited than she thought; it took only a few hard strokes to send her over the edge. She realized she'd just come while standing up, something she'd been trying to do for years with no success.
"Someone please come fuck me?" she said, and realized too late that she'd made Jack come in Pete's mouth. Well, there was no way of knowing that he liked her talking dirty that much.
The familiar feeling of Pete's dick in her cunt was combined with the new sensation of Jack's tongue easing over her clit. The realization that every stroke of Jack's tongue was arousing not only her, but Pete, excited her even more, and she knew that none of them were going to last much longer. Which was sad, because they were all having an awful lot of fun.
When Pete came, Sam clenched around him, and tried very hard to bite her tongue so the wrong name wouldn't come out, but just at that minute Jack decided it would be smart to suck very hard very suddenly, and Sam orgasmed. In her surprise, she couldn't repress a moan.
"Oh, God, Daniel...."
It was the last time they tried that experiment.
nostalgia_ljOh. My. God. I wrote Jack/Sam. o_O
[Jack/Sam/Pete. NC-17. Spoilers for "Affinity." Multiple partners, needless to say]
A Bad Idea
It happened, oddly enough, three weeks before Pete proposed to her. Though perhaps not so odd. People like Pete (who liked their sex missionary and their commitments formalized and their minivans inspected every thousand miles and who thought quirky was eating the cherry off an ice cream sundae first instead of last) would get the sexcapades out of the way before settling down. Still, she thought he might have waited till she'd promised to marry him before asking for a threesome.
But that was all in retrospect. At the time, she was more surprised by the request than by its timing. Not that Pete didn't strike her as the threesome type, just...
All right, Pete didn't strike her as the threesome type.
The second surprise came when she asked the General about it. She wasn't sure where she'd gotten the nerve to do that. Well, perhaps the tequila had helped, but she'd had lots of alcohol around General O'Neill (back when he was Colonel O'Neill) and it had never given her this much courage before.
Maybe it was the combination of the tequila and the hashish. She'd have to remember to thank Daniel for the hashish. If she ever recovered from the humiliation of asking General O'Neill to have sex with her.
As best she could remember, it had gone something like this:
She'd said, "Sir, would you have sex with me and Pete this Friday?"
And he'd said, "No, Carter," sort of woozily.
And she'd said, "You wouldn't have to touch his dick, sir."
And he'd said, "It's not Pete that's the problem."
And she'd said, "You don't want to have sex with me sir?" and taken another shot of tequila.
And he'd said, "I lo -- respect you too much, Carter," and taken another swig of beer.
And she'd said, "But you hate Pete."
And he'd said, "So? I hate Maybourne too. Besides which, I don't hate Pete. Very nice man."
And then Sam hadn't said anything else, because she'd passed out on Jack's couch.
Next, she had Pete ask Jack himself. "If you want to have sex with the man, just ask him," she'd said, and Pete had smiled and said, "That's what I love about you, Sam. You're so smart."
She had no idea what Pete had said, but whatever it was, it had changed the General's mind so fast she could practically hear it happening.
She had a feeling she really didn't want to know.
Pete was confident that as soon as they all got in the same room, they'd naturally leap on each other. Sam was less convinced, and had filled her fridge with a liberal supply of beer for the men. She wasn't surprised that the General brought another six-pack, the first of which he cracked open before he even sat down.
No one mentioned that it was awfully awkward. Pete was smiling so broadly that Sam didn't want to disappoint him, and the General was heroically downing as much beer as he could. Sam felt her stomach twist in anticipation as she leaned across Pete's lap to kiss her CO. He tasted, unsurprisingly, of beer, and smelled, surprisingly, of roses.
She could feel Pete's erection against her breasts, and she realized she might have leaned a bit too far over. She'd become lopsided. She felt two pairs of arms lifting her up, and decided that was a good enough start. She closed her eyes.
Two pairs of hands struggled to unzip her jeans; one pair lifted her shirt over her head while another unhooked her bra. With her eyes closed, she didn't know which hands were Pete's and which were -- Jack's -- and she liked it better that way. She concentrated on the two pairs of lips clamping shut around two nipples -- hers. She noticed, appallingly, that one tongue was moving clockwise and the other counterclockwise. Someone had better start fucking her soon, or she'd be calculating the angle of Pete's dick against his tummy.
Her eyes snapped open. "Undress," she said, in her best commanding officer voice.
"Yes, ma'am," said Jack with a wink, and Pete's eyes went glassy with desire. She watched them strip and smiled what she hoped was an evil smile. She suspected it might have been a leer. She struggled nobly not to compare dick size, but she was human after all, and they were practically begging her to --
Oh. That wasn't begging anymore. Pete had just sunk gracelessly to his knees and, without much ado, jammed Jack's dick into his mouth. Foreplay, much? But these were, after all, guys. Two guys. And they were putting this little display on just for her. They were her two guys.
She knew that she was wet. Dammit, she could feel herself getting wetter with every desperate lick Pete took. She slid a hand down to her clit, planning just to take the edge off, but she was more excited than she thought; it took only a few hard strokes to send her over the edge. She realized she'd just come while standing up, something she'd been trying to do for years with no success.
"Someone please come fuck me?" she said, and realized too late that she'd made Jack come in Pete's mouth. Well, there was no way of knowing that he liked her talking dirty that much.
The familiar feeling of Pete's dick in her cunt was combined with the new sensation of Jack's tongue easing over her clit. The realization that every stroke of Jack's tongue was arousing not only her, but Pete, excited her even more, and she knew that none of them were going to last much longer. Which was sad, because they were all having an awful lot of fun.
When Pete came, Sam clenched around him, and tried very hard to bite her tongue so the wrong name wouldn't come out, but just at that minute Jack decided it would be smart to suck very hard very suddenly, and Sam orgasmed. In her surprise, she couldn't repress a moan.
"Oh, God, Daniel...."
It was the last time they tried that experiment.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 08:00 am (UTC)that was SO not the ending i was expecting!
*filches around the room trying to find that other eyeball*
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
wow!
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 08:07 am (UTC)Wasn't the ending I was expecting either. Silly slut!Sam!muse.
And frankly, you got off lucky, considering some of the endings I considered. :p
:D
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 08:20 am (UTC);)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 08:23 am (UTC)In fact, probably the only reason it isn't Kinsey is becasue I didn't think people would get that Bob=Kinsey=ewww! :p
Also considered "Oh God, Janettttt," but that would have been too sad, considering it's set S8...
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 09:02 am (UTC)i jsut sat thinking - ok, who would be a shocker? george, no problem.... who would cause an increase in sought therapy/cardiac interventions? easily robert/bob kinsey... and no i can see that 'bob' woulnd't exactly bring kinsey to the fore for a lot of folks, but the diehards, etc., would get it in a heartbeat (presuming they still HAD one at that point!)
others i thought of and didn't use for my examples:
harry
siler
paul davis
walter davis
agent barrett
lou feretti
given the vagaries of the story, i didn't think janet would be used b/c of how sad that would make the ending... then there's elizabeth, hailey (whatever her first name is)... anise/freya ;)
so, you're neither predictable nor am i psychic... it was just a thought process :)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 09:49 am (UTC)Saying that, of course I loved this and more so because it was simply so funny and so true. I like a good 'everything goes all right' threesome as much as the next person, but it would be a damned sight closer to what you have here - awkward, embarrassing and funny as hell.
Thanks for sharing.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 09:37 pm (UTC)Bwa-ha-ha
Date: 2004-10-26 01:25 pm (UTC)*smiling like an idiot now*
P.S.
Date: 2004-10-26 01:28 pm (UTC)Re: P.S.
Date: 2004-10-26 09:37 pm (UTC)And I'm glad you liked it! *is all happy and stuff now*
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 08:54 pm (UTC)Yay!
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 09:38 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-26 09:59 pm (UTC)*luvs your smut*
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-27 12:10 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-27 03:17 pm (UTC)WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?
*collapses, crumbles, capitulates*
Jesus almighty, woman. You do the ebil S/J and then somehow, you make it work.
I always knew you'd never go darkside on me. :) Also, SG fic *sans* Daniel. Nah. Ari doesn't know the meaning of the words "sans Daniel".
- Meg
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-27 03:31 pm (UTC)But this "sans Daniel" thing. I am confused. How can there be
lifeStargate without Daniel?Well, I suppose there could be McKay, instead.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-27 11:15 pm (UTC)Recced here by
Damn, that's great! *grin*
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-28 05:35 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-05 06:23 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-05 09:31 pm (UTC)