this is why my parents kept me

I am going through my archives in search of fodder for presenting my spiritual journey to my Sunday school class on Sunday.

I did find a lovely Kindergarten picture of "Jeszus roz" -- I chosen the Marken version, featuring an angel (smiling beatifically), an empty tomb (black tomb with a big round hole, and the stone that has been rolled away from said hole; hole is, indeed, empty), and a woman (sore, sore afraid. Also wearing slacks, because Magdalene was a right-on anachronistic woman). There is another smaller figure in the background that is presumably one of the male disciples, keeping his distance.

I should point out that the first illustration in this particular journal is of a "Rainbow Castle." Let it never be said I didn't know where I wanted to live when I grew up!

I also found Baby's First Romance Story. It is epistolary.

To boy.

Af you war a knight. I wd lik to Be A Dgirn. Love glal.
[if you were a knight, I would like to be a dragon. Love, girl."

It is lovingly illustrated with a ginormous green dragon immolating a small figure in the corner that must, from context, be a knight.

D'aww, fairy tale romance!

100: A Political Thriller

By me, Ari, aged 7. Written February 11, 1993 - March 25, 1993.

[warnings for being written by a seven year old. Spelling and punctuation have been normalized, except when they're really funny.]

A new President... 100! There are 100 rooms in the white house. 100 is very happy. His family is very happy. 28 ran for president. He is sad before 100 became president. He laid a rose on 10's grave. It was on the [indecipherable] had a wife named Molly.

100 signed a law. 28 got more votes than 100, but 100 got more elecdrol [sic] votes. The law is that bosses have to pay more money to people that have families. And even more money to people that have children. 100 has a daughter named Chelsy. It is Chelsy's birthday. Some people are plotting against 100. Guess what - 28 is one of them! It's in every newspaper. Chelsy was screaming. They tried to get in last night. The Secret Service just barely stopped the. Chelsy has a new bed.

One of the secret service is a spy on 100. He lets the rest of the gang hang out in a room in the white house.

100 couldn't sleep last night. Chelse tiptoed out last night.

Shy caught a spy closing the door. Tonight Chelse got [indecipherable] She hid behind the door.

When the gang came, she listened carefully to what they said. Then she wrote on a piece of paper she brought. They said, "Let's try to get him tomorrow." That was enough. She tiptoed out of the room. The next day she ran to her father's office. She said, "Father, father, today the spies want to get you."

"How did you find out?"

It was too late. A hand reached out for 100!

"I told you, Father," said Celse.

"Do not be afraid," said the Secret Service. spie.

Just then Celse turned around her father was not there.

Molly said she was in the kitchen. So Celsey ran to the kitchen. Where was olly?

There was a note:

Dear Celsey,
I'm at the pool."

Celsey ran to the pool. Just as Celsey was about to warn her, a hand reached out and just like that Molly was gone.

"Yiks [sic]!" she said. She ran back to bed. She hugged her teddy bear and went to sleep. She went out to play with a secret service. All of a sudden Chelsy saw a hole! She looked inside. There was her father and mother. Celsy ran to get the phone. She called the police. The police arrested the bad guys. And lived happily ever after.

P.S.

The bad guys only got ten years of jail. And there was a new president. 15 was her name. And 100 died. 100's grave was in the hole.

15 lived happily as she lived.

[There is not actually a THE END, but I feel there should be. So]

THE END.

That was the first real story I wrote. It took me a whole month and I was really, really proud of it -- other people were journaling to the daily prompts about whatever, but me, I was grinding away on the story of 100 and his daughter Chelsy Celsy Chelsea. I think it's really stood the test of time, don't you?