teetering:

[wisdomeagle]

to church on high-heels. Mistake one. Wearing an old Easter dress now too short that makes me look like a hooker in downtown Staunton on Sunday morning: mistake two. Going to the Methodist church was not a mistake: it felt homey and comfortable, but like so much else, I would need to adapt to it: to learn names and faces and ritual and then I'd feel fine. The sermon was too long but almost good.

Feeling nothing at church hurts. And then it doesn't hurt which is almost worse. I wish I hadn't been so dependent on the ministerpeople. But if I hadn't, then I never would have gotten that absurd glowy feeling... so.

I should be studying but I feel like doing nothing at all. Just two exams... c'mon, Ari, you can do it!